A very Carol-y Day!

Went to Mum and Dad’s church for the day for a Christmas Carol service and Carols in the street. Loved seeing so many local families coming in the church and really felt the warmth of a family atmosphere. Had fun playing with the kids, at the end we made shadow animals with the projector. I forgotten how easy and simple kids are, their worlds are not complicated, they are just themselves living life from one moment to the next.

Dad gave a cracking talk today and Mum did her speciality – making everyone well fed, comfortable and welcomed. It was a lovely day and I feel very Christmassy now… right down to my toes! Going to sleep content, with my hair smelling of woodsmoke and my mind full of lovely memories. 

Home for Christmas!

For real, not in my dreams J

Log fire, family meal, new haircut… my beautiful town. Yay.

I even managed to finish my Christmas newsletter!

‘The plan for your life is unfolding before you. Sometimes the road you are travelling seems blocked, or it opens up painfully slowly that you must hold yourself back. 

Then, when time is right, the way clears - through no effort of your own. What you worked for God presents to you freely, as a pure gift….do not fear your weakness for it is the stage on which God's power and Glory perform most brilliantly. 

As you preserve along the path God has prepared for you, depending on His strength to sustain you, expect to see miracles – and you will. Miracles are not always visible to the naked eye, but those who live by faith can see them clearly. 

Living by faith rather than sight, enables you to see His glory.’ <3

- Jesus Calling. 

Day 82/252 Farewell Matthew

Ever so long marathon day! But I DID IT!!!!! I wrote my essay finished my assignment, packed and everything. Phew.

Really enjoyed everything God showed me about Him through the genealogy of Matthew. Loved seeing family again, legacy and hope for the future. Too much revelation and no time to process, argh! Hope I get some down time in the holidays to absorb some of this beautiful revelation. 

Day 81/252 Living it up!

Almost there but not quite… so close! Loved doing my BRI tonight. I’m realising how much I really love history, and I love that about me! 

Other people are going to parties, movies or Christmas meals....and I'm sitting in the classroom living it up in the first century... Roll on tomorrow night!   

Day 80/252 Lush!

Got test back… weeeeeeeee! (the excited sound Liesel makes in the Sound of Music in the garden, when it’s raining!)

Christmas meal, carols by candlelight and Christmas movie! Yay.

Day 79/252 Those Blessed Cheesemakers

So many paragraph titles… epic horizontal interspersed with amusing moments… 

"Blessed are the cheesema...., I mean peacemakers, Blessed are the peacemakers..'
This just happened.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RpkWT5voTSE

Day 78/252 Book #21 Matthew

Went to doctors today with severe stomach pain, says I have digestion problems and IBS, will have to look at understanding which foods trigger this because my tummy is not a happy bunny.

Almost there…. Can almost taste Christmas but can’t quite reach it! 

Felt sick all day and ended up with migraine so had to miss Christmas SBS party…. However, I did sleep well, first night right through in, well, I can’t remember since when!!

Day 77/252 Yuck.

Had terrible stomach spasms today and sickness, don’t know why but think it’s food related. Pain.

Observed Matthew, sooooo loooooong!

Day 76/252 Kept by Him.

Woke up feeling sick and last thing I wanted to do was do the test. I decided to call it a quiz to make me feel better!

Felt peace about it and just thought well, if I don’t know it by now then I don’t know it…! This it went really well in the end!

One of my friends put it like this:

‘End of term test done! Woot! Astheticism, liberalism, Sadducees, Pharisees, Claudius, Nero, Famine, Council of Jerusalem, c.30AD, 49AD, 64AD ..... I probably spelt nothing right on this test lol’

Sounds about right!

Loved charting today, revelation! This from my Vertical charts. Especially this bit which really blew my heart up…

‘The Lord is not slow to fulfil his promise as some count slowness, but is patient toward you, not wishing that any should perish, but that all should reach repentance.’ 2 Peter 3:9

Peter reacts to a possible untruth told about Christ’s coming back. He says that the Lord is not slow in fulfilling his promise. Why would he say this unless he has heard they are being lied to!? The scoffers doubted the promise 3:4. The coming of the Lord was a big deal because of the hope they had through this promise. They needed this assurance and they had it before the false teachers came. Peter goes on to say ‘as some would count slowness’. 

Perhaps they were telling the churches that the Lord was slow deliberately making them wait in vain, not saving them from their persecution, suggesting he was untruthful to his word. When in fact it was the false teachers who were untrustworthy. Peter goes on to say the Lord is patient not wishing anyone should perish. This would have quietened the voice of liars. 

Peter is speaking out God’s character, he is patient, but he is also merciful. He doesn’t want anyone to perish, he wants all to reach salvation. How glorious that truth is in light of the deception the churches would have been facing. A God they could count on to love them and wait patiently for others to come to know him!

Another bit that really got me was when Peter writes; According to his great mercy, he has caused us to be born again to a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, to an inheritance that is imperishable, undefiled, and unfading, kept in heaven for you. 1 Peter 4:4-5

Day 75/252 Book# 20 Jude

Had an AWESOME lecture on Jude today by Andy, wow loved it. Here’s a glimpse from my charting…

Figurative Language: Jude describes the false teachers or ‘certain people’ among the churches as ‘Waterless clouds…Swept away by winds…wandering stars.’ Here he uses figurative language which is beautiful but also a very Jewish way of writing, considering this was most likely to a Jewish audience. 

It’s beautiful because it is poetic but what Jude is describing is far from pretty. ‘Waterless clouds’, means that they are empty, devoid of any use, especially not for refreshment or for watering the ground. Which is what clouds are normally for; growing crops and refreshing parched lands. In direct contrast to the water of life Jesus brings. 

He says they are ‘swept away by winds’, meaning they are unstable and easily changed, fickle and changeable in nature. People like this usually snap at you in irritation when you do something they don’t like because they are not secure and have no identity to stand on. Not enjoyable people to be around, they would have been like poison to the churches. 

He calls them ‘wandering stars’, which have no use at all. Stars were used to guide yourself by in the night sky, they were extremely important, because they were fixed points to navigate. If one was wandering it would have been dangerous, you could have got lost at night or even worse, lost at sea. 

Jude is basically using these examples to tell the church they need to stay away, not only are these people false, empty and useless but they are extremely dangerous!

Day 74/252 Because of love.

Today I was struggling to find anywhere quiet where I just be with my Father God. I knew I needed to re focus and just be his daughter but I was panicky when people were everywhere to the point of crying. Eventually I found somewhere and read this. It made me weep as my heart was squeezed with the reminder of why I’m doing this, because I just love him.

'Alexander Maclaren, the great Scottish preacher, attributed everything he knew to one habit: spending an hour each day alone with God. 

Sometimes he allowed others into his study, but they were never allowed to speak. Maclaren would sit in a well-worn armchair with his Bible lying across his knees. Sometimes he’d read its pages, but mostly he’d just sit with his hand over his face. 

During that hour he wouldn’t read the Bible as a student, or study it for sermons. One of his assistants noted, ‘He read it as a child would read a letter from an absent father, or your heart would drink in the words of a loved one from far away.’ 

How well do you know the Lord? How well do you want to know Him? The answer is not in what you say, but in what you do. What you truly desire, you pursue. The Psalmist said, ‘When You said, “Seek My face,” my heart said to You, “Your face, Lord, I will seek.’’’

http://www.ucb.co.uk/word-for-today-22933.html

Day 73/252 Book #19 2 Peter

I think I’m enjoying the 2 Peter’s more than a lot of other books we’ve studied, looking forward to charting and taking that time with God. Very tired though but will push through.

Pondering on this today…

http://brenebrown.com/2013/12/10/rsabear/

Day 72/252 Book #18 1 Peter

Giving myself freedom to have time to myself today. Amongst getting back into the swing of everything. Read some of my novel, went of a walk, felt the fresh air on my face – it was like a holiday! I need to do more of this. 

Day 71/252. The mountain.

This morning was difficult, it was like everything was happening around me and I wasn't registering any of it.
Then Andy gave us a picture to think about. He said this point in term is like a mountain with a very steep face. Some of the faces and more slanted and not as tough but this week especially it like a sheer cliff. He encouraged us to just hold on, with all we have, with a pick axe. Just hold on, it will get better. This is one of the hardest weeks!
I thought it was just me until he said that, granted I've been away but I was feeling the atmosphere!
It's time to stand firm again, be steadfast as it says in James.
This is my turning point. To stand on my path and do not sway. (see Picture!)

Day 70/252. The Worst Day.

Lots happened today. Too much.
Today was the only part of the SBS so far when I've considered if this is worth it?
I don't feel part of the experience of the school and I'm not excited to study.
I'm really not sleeping well.
Maybe this is just a bad day, let's hope that's all it is!

Day 69/252. Back to the Lodge!

Today was back to the Lodge day. Hard to leave home because I become more in love with Shrewsbury every time. But know I'm on the right path for now.
Got to spend time with Dad in the car on the way back and see his scissor sharpening business first hand!
Got back to Dinner for 8 at Andy's place, was so nice with an open fire, good foods and good friends.

Day 68/252. Studying from Home. Book #16 Titus #17 James

Today I studied from home, next to our open fire. Marinating in home, family and wood smoke. Definitely turned a corner in my health.
Enjoying James!

Day 67/252. Attempt #2.

Time to let go. Today I attempted to go out again to get my strength back. It was great! Mum and I were in town and just enjoyed the Christmas-ness! I really love my home town.
Learned a bit more of what it means to rest in myself when I have no control over circumstances.
I had a dream that I had gone back to the Lodge too early, I had a terrible time then I heard a loud voice say: "You only have one body". I woke up straight away because the voice sounded like it was in the room with me.
Then it dawned on me, I need to look after myself because this is the only body I have. I think God has been trying to tell me this and I'm finally getting it.

Day 66/252. Decision to stay. Book #15 2Timothy

Today I decided to stay at home. That was a hard decision.
I really want to go back but still unwell.
Tough to admit weakness but necessary.
Read and did horizontal for 2 Timothy.

Day 65/252. Attempt #1. Book #14 1Timothy

So the plan was to go back to the Lodge tomorrow. Therefore, today marked attempt #1 of getting dressed and out into the world.
I woke up with a swollen sore throat and finding it hard to speak. Great start.
It took me forever just to get ready, still feeling exhausted. Managed to go into town with Mum, was all going well...then it got kinda busy, people were everywhere, I got really hot and dizzy and felt so sick.
We found a cafe and I sat down sipping hot lemon tea wondering why I'm not better yet.
My poor Mum had to put up with my grumpiness and then we came home. Mother's are amazing you know. If you ever read this Mum... i love you!
So now I'm home again feeling sick and wondering how on earth I'm going to go back tomorrow and start a new week.
I read 1 Timothy tonight and did my horizontal, probably shouldn't have but I wanted to do something.
I also made some filters for my camera. Now I feel like I've ran a marathon. Literally.
God, I don't know how to get better, please help me x
.....I think maybe you are telling me how I'm bad at resting...hmmm.

Day 64/252. Just Kidding.

Today I woke up and felt some relief in eating, I was like hurray... then I realised it was just an illusion and actually I was still ill, boo. So.... watched movies all day in bed and by the fire with Mum then in bed again.
Missing the Lodge and my life there.
I would like to be well now please. Help me be patient, Jesus.
My devotion tday told me to be in the moment and enjoy it, I'm working on that.

Day 63/252. Pyjama Day

Who am I kidding...it is a pyjama week!
Still not better today .. made it downstairs and decided to watch TV, soo much daytime TV and Christmas movies.
Restful here but I'm not good at being a patient, I want to be better ..now.
Getting good sleep though which helps I'm sure!

Day 62/252. Home Thoughts

Today I'm glad to be home, still feel terribly ill.
But... I had home cooked food from my Mum, although I can't eat solid food so I feel a bit like baby, warm bed, my own room ... I just read a fiction book all day!
I was pondering today and realised after having chats with Dad in the car yesterday about Bible stuff, that I think I am retaining more than I think from what I'm learning!
We were talking about the revelations I'd had and he was sharing his. I'm realising how much I've learnt in these two short months and how much I want to go back soon for more!
The bigger picture of everything is coming more into view and I see more of God, his history, my history!
I read this week that faith comes by hearing. It made me think of the disciples and how they were with Jesus all the time witnessing his miracles and they still lacked faith, they still doubted and they were still afraid. People today say that if Jesus appeared then they would believe in him. I remember on outreach in the Isle of Man some guy said that to me on the street. They complain about Him not showing up when they really need him. But, it isn't true is it. People can see something amazing happen right in front of their eyes and they still doubt. God knows that.
I can see now that if Jesus did appear in front of them, it is likely it wouldn't be enough for them. Because faith is more than that.
Paul says in Romans, faith comes by hearing.
Because it is more than seeing with our eyes. Hearing means we take it in in our mind and faith means we act on what we believe in our heart.
It's not a matter of just seeing something to believe it.
I'm going to remember this the next time on outreach someone asks me to call God down from heaven just for them to believe!

Day 61/252. Time to Let go.

Enough was enough as I woke up this morning for the seventh day in a row with excruciating mouth ulcers, completely unrested and feeling ill. I thought I could push through til Christmas,I was wrong.
I made it to lectures this morning, purely because A.I love SBS and B. My amazing friend Sandrine was teaching. How could I miss it?
Well, it was pretty terrible .. I couldn't concentrate because my mouth hurt so much and was at a loss to know what to do.
I went to the pharmacy again but they said they couldn't do anything I just needed to rest.
Then someone asked me to consider going home for a few days rest. Which I immediately discounted..
Then slowly I started to consider it and the more I did the more it sounded heavenly. I could actually get some rest at home and come back refreshed, hopefully over this virus!
So I called home and Mum and Dad said they'd already been talking about coming to get me of I was much worse....Dad says he'd come and pick me up in a couple of hours...and so after a chat with Andy my school leader, before I know it I'm driving back with Dad. I've had a lovely welcome from my cat who ran out the see me, a wonderful bubble bath and now sitting but a warm fire.
Thanks for working this out God, you know I didn't want to leave but you knew I needed this. Get me well soon x

Day 60/252. Book #13 Romans.

Today I read Romans, barely.
My immune system is low and I'm so tired. My doctor told me I had to rest. So I rested today but I know it's not enough. I just hope my sleep gets more effective and I can gain strength to carry on because I love this course so much.
I need you strength, Jesus.
Taryn and Mike and my teacher, Sandrine are here... this makes me so happy!

Day 59/252. Birmingham Christmas Market!

We need to get out more!

Today was awesome, good friends, good food, good outing!

Lots of sparkly lights and christmassy things.

Day 58/252. Saturdays look like this.

Today was a bit like this...
Working, working, working, study, study, revelation, revelation, revelation, working, working, working, SUBMIT... Red2.

:)

Day 57/252. Book #12 Philippians

Deepak taught us on Philippians today. I love this book. I know it doesn't have a set structure and it's purpose might not be clear but ... I love the gems to be found. There is so much tied up in these four small chapters.
I'm still so wrapped up in Paul's heart for the churches, God's heart.
Getting a deeper love for God, that's for sure!

Day 56/252. Book #11. Colossians

Ray taught on Colossians today. He showed us a bowl of ice cream and told us it was Jesus. He asked us, is this enough of it's own? He decided not, and so added toppings, yum we thought, toppings are great! Then he produced a bunch of toppings that were not what we had in mind... ketup, tabasco, pepper, etc. He mixed it all on and asked if anyone wanted a taste!
This what the church in Colossae did to their salvation. They had accepted Jesus but then mixed in a bit of all the other religions that were in their city, the mystic religions and cults. Paul tells them no, Christ is IN all and above all and he dwells in You!
Ray left us with the challenge... Do you add anything to Jesus, to your salvation? Is Jesus alone enough for you or are you adding more to it.
Jesus +______=Salvation
He also spoke about value as a child of God, the simplicity of being.
It was amazing.

Day 55/252. It is worth it.

More of Gods heart today.
Amazing lecture from Phil Leage, loved the part about the age of evil and the age to come, and the tension inbetween. Never understood that before!
Watched Blue Planet for small group, we had fun.
My friend blessed me with gluten free cakes, I was so surprised and happy.
Interpretations all night, so tired now, but worth it.

Day 54/252. Weakness.

Every letter I read that Paul writes my heart it's squeezed for him. What a life he had.
I'm in love with his father heart for the church in Corinth, he calls them 'my beloved'. Again and again they do things wrong, in 2 Corinthians some even believe false teaching against him..some doubt him, and poke at his weaknesses. Yet he remains loving.
Yes, he is firm, but it's his father heart that shines through.
And of course, God that shines through Paul..straight to my heart. Straight to the places where I have doubted, where I have poked at God.
And what does he do but love me back all the more. Because, I am his beloved.
As much as my heart aches for the church in Corinth to honour Paul back so I will honour my God. With love.
Paul writes that Christs power is made perfect in his weakness. That yes, he had many weaknesses and he is vulnerable and raw to share them openly. He is real in a church with falsehoods. He bears all because he knows it is not a fault to be weak. Because when he is weakest that is when God can do the most.
When his humanness is next to nothing in strength, God can move mightily. And he did throughout Pauls life.

Thank you God for blessing me with another insight into your Father heart. I am open for more.

Day 53/252. Day in bed.

I spent today in bed, ill.
I did, however, manage to do work in bed and got a fair bit done!
I hope I get better because we have 3 awesome books this week... 2 Corinthians, Colossians and Philippians.
Amazing stuff....please God, I don't want to miss a thing!

Day 52/252. Book #10: 2 Corinthians.

Today I started on reading and observing 2 Corinthians, it's so good to get the sequel to the church in Corinth!

Getting poorly my throat is swollen....ergh.
So tired.

My roommate cut my hair today :)

Day 51/252. Kinda day off.

Here in this season I have kinda days off. They are days off that are really not. But still good!
I worked until early afternoon, got my assignment in then went into town with Jacki. Had my Opticians appointment, where they took photos of my eyeball..super exciting. Then had coffee with Jacki, hit some shops, came home for dinner and watched the Hobbit extended version with SBS.
I'd say that was a good day. Not restful but good.

Day 50/252. Day of contrasts.

Today I did my preach on Love. I enjoyed it but also struggled with being assessed at the same time. Didn't feel free.
Hopefully the message God wanted to share came across <3
Then I went bowling with the media guys, was nice to get out and have some fun with old friends!
Spent the rest of my Friday night working on my verticles.
Slow progress but God was revealing things which makes it worth it!

Day 49/252. Preparation!

Spent a lot of today preparing for my preach tomorrow. We have a class assignment to select a segment from 1 Corinthians to teach or preach on.
I didn't know what to do but I asked God and got one word: Love.
So that it's what I will do.

Day 48/252. A productive day!

It's always a lovely feeling when you are on track with what you need to do!
I finished all my BRI and flashcards and horizontal chart. Oh a journal from last week..oops!
Now I just need to figure out what to preach on Friday. Let's pray some revelation comes to mind! Love you, Jesus.

Day 47/252. Corinth.

Today we took a trip back in time to Corinth.
It was awesome but also surprisingly hard. Que memories from my time in Greece years ago. But God did stuff and the day got so much better with amazing friends old and new.
I have to keep saying how blessed I am to have such wonderful God loving people around me!

Day 46/252. Book #9: 1 Corinthians.

Today we learnt how to preach and teach and the differences.
On Friday we get to do our own preach ourselves.
Terrified and excited at the same time.
Worship tonight was incredible.
I love this community so much. God is moving, transforming lives and impacting nations among us.

Day 45/252. Long weekend: Sunday rest.

More of the same..thank you God!