Day 65/252. Attempt #1. Book #14 1Timothy

So the plan was to go back to the Lodge tomorrow. Therefore, today marked attempt #1 of getting dressed and out into the world.
I woke up with a swollen sore throat and finding it hard to speak. Great start.
It took me forever just to get ready, still feeling exhausted. Managed to go into town with Mum, was all going well...then it got kinda busy, people were everywhere, I got really hot and dizzy and felt so sick.
We found a cafe and I sat down sipping hot lemon tea wondering why I'm not better yet.
My poor Mum had to put up with my grumpiness and then we came home. Mother's are amazing you know. If you ever read this Mum... i love you!
So now I'm home again feeling sick and wondering how on earth I'm going to go back tomorrow and start a new week.
I read 1 Timothy tonight and did my horizontal, probably shouldn't have but I wanted to do something.
I also made some filters for my camera. Now I feel like I've ran a marathon. Literally.
God, I don't know how to get better, please help me x
.....I think maybe you are telling me how I'm bad at resting...hmmm.

Day 64/252. Just Kidding.

Today I woke up and felt some relief in eating, I was like hurray... then I realised it was just an illusion and actually I was still ill, boo. So.... watched movies all day in bed and by the fire with Mum then in bed again.
Missing the Lodge and my life there.
I would like to be well now please. Help me be patient, Jesus.
My devotion tday told me to be in the moment and enjoy it, I'm working on that.

Day 63/252. Pyjama Day

Who am I kidding...it is a pyjama week!
Still not better today .. made it downstairs and decided to watch TV, soo much daytime TV and Christmas movies.
Restful here but I'm not good at being a patient, I want to be better ..now.
Getting good sleep though which helps I'm sure!

Day 62/252. Home Thoughts

Today I'm glad to be home, still feel terribly ill.
But... I had home cooked food from my Mum, although I can't eat solid food so I feel a bit like baby, warm bed, my own room ... I just read a fiction book all day!
I was pondering today and realised after having chats with Dad in the car yesterday about Bible stuff, that I think I am retaining more than I think from what I'm learning!
We were talking about the revelations I'd had and he was sharing his. I'm realising how much I've learnt in these two short months and how much I want to go back soon for more!
The bigger picture of everything is coming more into view and I see more of God, his history, my history!
I read this week that faith comes by hearing. It made me think of the disciples and how they were with Jesus all the time witnessing his miracles and they still lacked faith, they still doubted and they were still afraid. People today say that if Jesus appeared then they would believe in him. I remember on outreach in the Isle of Man some guy said that to me on the street. They complain about Him not showing up when they really need him. But, it isn't true is it. People can see something amazing happen right in front of their eyes and they still doubt. God knows that.
I can see now that if Jesus did appear in front of them, it is likely it wouldn't be enough for them. Because faith is more than that.
Paul says in Romans, faith comes by hearing.
Because it is more than seeing with our eyes. Hearing means we take it in in our mind and faith means we act on what we believe in our heart.
It's not a matter of just seeing something to believe it.
I'm going to remember this the next time on outreach someone asks me to call God down from heaven just for them to believe!

Day 61/252. Time to Let go.

Enough was enough as I woke up this morning for the seventh day in a row with excruciating mouth ulcers, completely unrested and feeling ill. I thought I could push through til Christmas,I was wrong.
I made it to lectures this morning, purely because A.I love SBS and B. My amazing friend Sandrine was teaching. How could I miss it?
Well, it was pretty terrible .. I couldn't concentrate because my mouth hurt so much and was at a loss to know what to do.
I went to the pharmacy again but they said they couldn't do anything I just needed to rest.
Then someone asked me to consider going home for a few days rest. Which I immediately discounted..
Then slowly I started to consider it and the more I did the more it sounded heavenly. I could actually get some rest at home and come back refreshed, hopefully over this virus!
So I called home and Mum and Dad said they'd already been talking about coming to get me of I was much worse....Dad says he'd come and pick me up in a couple of hours...and so after a chat with Andy my school leader, before I know it I'm driving back with Dad. I've had a lovely welcome from my cat who ran out the see me, a wonderful bubble bath and now sitting but a warm fire.
Thanks for working this out God, you know I didn't want to leave but you knew I needed this. Get me well soon x

Day 60/252. Book #13 Romans.

Today I read Romans, barely.
My immune system is low and I'm so tired. My doctor told me I had to rest. So I rested today but I know it's not enough. I just hope my sleep gets more effective and I can gain strength to carry on because I love this course so much.
I need you strength, Jesus.
Taryn and Mike and my teacher, Sandrine are here... this makes me so happy!

Day 59/252. Birmingham Christmas Market!

We need to get out more!

Today was awesome, good friends, good food, good outing!

Lots of sparkly lights and christmassy things.

Day 58/252. Saturdays look like this.

Today was a bit like this...
Working, working, working, study, study, revelation, revelation, revelation, working, working, working, SUBMIT... Red2.

:)

Day 57/252. Book #12 Philippians

Deepak taught us on Philippians today. I love this book. I know it doesn't have a set structure and it's purpose might not be clear but ... I love the gems to be found. There is so much tied up in these four small chapters.
I'm still so wrapped up in Paul's heart for the churches, God's heart.
Getting a deeper love for God, that's for sure!

Day 56/252. Book #11. Colossians

Ray taught on Colossians today. He showed us a bowl of ice cream and told us it was Jesus. He asked us, is this enough of it's own? He decided not, and so added toppings, yum we thought, toppings are great! Then he produced a bunch of toppings that were not what we had in mind... ketup, tabasco, pepper, etc. He mixed it all on and asked if anyone wanted a taste!
This what the church in Colossae did to their salvation. They had accepted Jesus but then mixed in a bit of all the other religions that were in their city, the mystic religions and cults. Paul tells them no, Christ is IN all and above all and he dwells in You!
Ray left us with the challenge... Do you add anything to Jesus, to your salvation? Is Jesus alone enough for you or are you adding more to it.
Jesus +______=Salvation
He also spoke about value as a child of God, the simplicity of being.
It was amazing.

Day 55/252. It is worth it.

More of Gods heart today.
Amazing lecture from Phil Leage, loved the part about the age of evil and the age to come, and the tension inbetween. Never understood that before!
Watched Blue Planet for small group, we had fun.
My friend blessed me with gluten free cakes, I was so surprised and happy.
Interpretations all night, so tired now, but worth it.

Day 54/252. Weakness.

Every letter I read that Paul writes my heart it's squeezed for him. What a life he had.
I'm in love with his father heart for the church in Corinth, he calls them 'my beloved'. Again and again they do things wrong, in 2 Corinthians some even believe false teaching against him..some doubt him, and poke at his weaknesses. Yet he remains loving.
Yes, he is firm, but it's his father heart that shines through.
And of course, God that shines through Paul..straight to my heart. Straight to the places where I have doubted, where I have poked at God.
And what does he do but love me back all the more. Because, I am his beloved.
As much as my heart aches for the church in Corinth to honour Paul back so I will honour my God. With love.
Paul writes that Christs power is made perfect in his weakness. That yes, he had many weaknesses and he is vulnerable and raw to share them openly. He is real in a church with falsehoods. He bears all because he knows it is not a fault to be weak. Because when he is weakest that is when God can do the most.
When his humanness is next to nothing in strength, God can move mightily. And he did throughout Pauls life.

Thank you God for blessing me with another insight into your Father heart. I am open for more.

Day 53/252. Day in bed.

I spent today in bed, ill.
I did, however, manage to do work in bed and got a fair bit done!
I hope I get better because we have 3 awesome books this week... 2 Corinthians, Colossians and Philippians.
Amazing stuff....please God, I don't want to miss a thing!

Day 52/252. Book #10: 2 Corinthians.

Today I started on reading and observing 2 Corinthians, it's so good to get the sequel to the church in Corinth!

Getting poorly my throat is swollen....ergh.
So tired.

My roommate cut my hair today :)

Day 51/252. Kinda day off.

Here in this season I have kinda days off. They are days off that are really not. But still good!
I worked until early afternoon, got my assignment in then went into town with Jacki. Had my Opticians appointment, where they took photos of my eyeball..super exciting. Then had coffee with Jacki, hit some shops, came home for dinner and watched the Hobbit extended version with SBS.
I'd say that was a good day. Not restful but good.

Day 50/252. Day of contrasts.

Today I did my preach on Love. I enjoyed it but also struggled with being assessed at the same time. Didn't feel free.
Hopefully the message God wanted to share came across <3
Then I went bowling with the media guys, was nice to get out and have some fun with old friends!
Spent the rest of my Friday night working on my verticles.
Slow progress but God was revealing things which makes it worth it!

Day 49/252. Preparation!

Spent a lot of today preparing for my preach tomorrow. We have a class assignment to select a segment from 1 Corinthians to teach or preach on.
I didn't know what to do but I asked God and got one word: Love.
So that it's what I will do.

Day 48/252. A productive day!

It's always a lovely feeling when you are on track with what you need to do!
I finished all my BRI and flashcards and horizontal chart. Oh a journal from last week..oops!
Now I just need to figure out what to preach on Friday. Let's pray some revelation comes to mind! Love you, Jesus.

Day 47/252. Corinth.

Today we took a trip back in time to Corinth.
It was awesome but also surprisingly hard. Que memories from my time in Greece years ago. But God did stuff and the day got so much better with amazing friends old and new.
I have to keep saying how blessed I am to have such wonderful God loving people around me!

Day 46/252. Book #9: 1 Corinthians.

Today we learnt how to preach and teach and the differences.
On Friday we get to do our own preach ourselves.
Terrified and excited at the same time.
Worship tonight was incredible.
I love this community so much. God is moving, transforming lives and impacting nations among us.

Day 45/252. Long weekend: Sunday rest.

More of the same..thank you God!

Day 44/252. Long weekend: time with friends.

Restful day...time with friends, charity shops, coffee house, fire place and a good book :)

Day 43/252. Long weekend!

Lie in, lion king, pride and prejudice...good start to long weekend.

Day 42/252. With him anything is possible.

I've seriously felt the furthest from those kinds of inspiring words but tonight I realised something.
Even if you think its truly impossible...if you partner with God and focus on what needs to be done anything its possible. I've learnt how important that focus is.
I've learnt how important the partnering with God is, I need to play my part too.
I'm learning how when I promise something I stand by that.
I'm learning that I love the freedom boundaries bring.
Today Andy asked us to all promise at midnight we would summit our work no matter if it was finished or not. In order for us not to work at all during our long weekend.
I did it, I'm proud of myself. I finished and just in time!

Day 41/252. Next generation.

Today in intercession we prayed for all the little kids on base. For their futures and their lives in Jesus. We are so fortunate to have so many families. Loved it. Prayed for them. Amazing time <3
1 thess teaching by Keith...brilliant stuff!

Day 40/252. The other side.

Today was lighter than the last week, the heaviness has lifted and things seem better somehow.
I read in my devotion today that Jesus will get you through to the other side, referring to walking on water on the lake with his disciples. Clinging to that at the moment that he will get me there.
Finishing up Galatians, but a lot to do this week.
Went to bonfire and fireworks night tonight was great :) loved being together with loads of the community amongst the wider community.
Thank you for today, Jesus.

Day 39/252. Vulnerable.

Today had much communication breakdown with people, which makes me sad.
But tonight was nice with God doing cool things.
Finished 3 horizontal charts.
Still, I'm ready for this day to be done.

Day 38/252. Book #6 Galatians, #7 1 Thessalonians& #8 2 Thessalonians.

Today I read through Galatians and 1&2 Thessalonians as well as did my observations.
Now let's start another week fresh, eh God?...

Day 37/252. I did it!

Today I caught up on all my work...then rested. Proud of myself.

Day 36/252. Getting there!

Today a wonderful friend of mine offered her spare room for me to stay in...it may not sound much but I might as well be in a five star hotel for how it's making me feel! So relaxed right now.
I was even productive tonight doing 4 pieces of work I needed to do for Acts. Including my journal which I had fun with!
Tomorrow I need to finish my timeline and Pauls missionary journeys and I'll be done with Acts. I've really loved this book, fascinating...so much more to explore but no time. The Bible is truly amazing.